Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Passion

It's a powerful word, isn't it? It encompasses a strength, just in typing it, just in saying it. When you're feeling it, it can be overwhelming.

Over the years, this word has been used to describe me, and now a lot of the times I choose it when I need that "What's one word to describe you?" answer to questions. I think, however, sometimes passionate and tenacious are entwined. I am passionate. When I fall in love, I do so completely and totally. And when I fall out of love, I do so immediately. When I take on a project, whether it's a craft item or a book, I become engrossed with it. Which is why, I truly believe, I am having a hard time in starting my next book. I know that once I do, that drive will kick in and I will be lost to anything else.

Passion lacks reason. When consumed with passion, you can't very well make thoughtful and considerate decisions. You're lost in the passion, the moment, the person. All that matters at that moment IS that moment. Nothing else. It's a fire that blazes and burns and if allowed to grow out of control, it can destroy. If left untended, it becomes this low, smoldering heat. If not stroked and teased, it eventually dies out. One moment there's heat, and then, nothing but ash.

You can love without passion. And passion without love. Some people may think that love and passion are the same thing. I assure you, they are not. Love is cozy feeling, a warmth that spreads and lasts for years, passes through generations. Love has highs and lows, peeks and valleys. Love is comforting. Love is safety, a surety of things. The knowledge that it will always be, one way or another. Like the sun rising, you know you will have love.

Now think of passion. Comforting is not something you think of when you imagine the word "passion", is it? It's immediate, it's fuel that drives us. It makes us lose all reasoning. Nothing matters at all but the moment of right now. It's like a climax, constantly on the edge, waiting and waiting and building and building and then this explosive moment that blinds you, the flashes and the lights and the sensation of a small death. You can have love without all of that. But you cannot have passion without it. And if one is not careful, passion can dance on the wire with a little friend called Obsession.

Both of them consume. Both of them control. Both of them burn you up from the inside out. The line that separates them, I believe, is very blurred.

I don't know why passion is on my mind. Well, that's a lie. I do know. But I won't tell you. I will tell you that I have been reading the Blaze line and I have no doubt that I can write this particular borderline erotica. One thing you do not find in the Blaze books (at least, I haven't so far), is love. But they drip with an overflowing amount of passion. Raw, hungry passion.

I can't get my brain to work right this morning. I haven't blogged much lately, and I'm feeling the strain for the first time in my life of getting my thoughts down on paper. It's quite the odd sensation. As Stephen King says, ever so wisely: We have to exercise our brain to write.

He's right. And he's waiting for me, so off I must go to study.

If you could only choose one to feel, which would you choose? Love or Passion? My answer: Now and always, I want to feel passion above all else.

6 comments:

WalkSports.com said...

Wow! Sounds like you were describing me. I've been told by many that I am a passionate individual. I believe that it is passion that drives us to do incredible things. How else could it be that I motivated myself to run not only one marathon, but two .. and thinking of more. It isn't love. It is passion. Why would I fly to Omaha on a Friday night, run a half marathon in Des Moines on Saturday and one in Lincoln on Sunday? Passion. And I think you also nailed it on the head in the statement "...with a little friend called Obsession." I've been guilty of that too in the past. I've done things that could be considered borderline obsessive, but they also involved a very special word too: care! Which I think you can separate from the others (love, passion).

Nic said...

I would have to choose love. Love lasts, passion doesn't. Love looks forward to the next 50 years. Passion looks forward to the next 50 minutes. Love takes work, passion takes about 15 minutes if you're lucky. I believe that anything you have to work for is worth holding on to.

Glad to see you made it home ok. You looked good last night and more chipper than the previous month's meeting. I can't wait until Reno! Yes, if I win the contest I will buy drinks for your room and mine.

Brenda Bradshaw said...

Well, ideally, we'd have both. I believe that if you start with passion in a relationship, you can move to love. I don't believe that if you start with love without passion, that the passion will suddenly be there. If you go into love without the passion, you're stuck forever without it. Passion can grow to allow love, without losing itself. Love can't become a passion.

Passion, in this sense, the way I'm talking about, isn't sex. Of course, it CAN be. I'd hope my passion for writing lasts more than 15 minutes!! LOL! My passion (obsession) with reading has lasted for years. Same as my passion for chatrooms and all things internet. It's a passion, and if either of those things are not available to me (like Internet while I'm at my parents), I get grumpy and feel like I'm dying without my "fix". You can be absolutely passionate about something, or someone, for YEARS, not mere minutes.

I don't know why I was happier last night. Frankly, I wasn't overly impressed with our speaker. But anytime I'm around the other writers, there's an energy there that I love to tab into. And I just adore Janece and cracked up listening to her little comments under her breath. She is SUCH a riot.

Now to find a topic to blog on for today.

Bill said...

First, I like your blog, and the way you express your thoughts... I found it from a link on Nic's place.

Love/Passion...

I want to love the woman I'm passionate about, love my job *because* I'm passionate about what I do, love my life *because* I'm passionate about living it.

You're right about passion and obsession standing close to one another, that losing yourself in passion can lead to obession... interesting though, obsession rarely leads to passion, in fact, in my experience once obsession kicks in, passion fades.

I hope I never lose the passion.

Brenda Bradshaw said...

Hi Bill. I'm glad you came by and I hope you do more often. I think the greatest thing in life is pure, unbridled passion. But I guess you can tell that by my post :)

Bill said...

I'd have to say I agree... Although it's gotten me into almsot as much trouble as it has fun... I just wouldn't know how to live any other way... life is far too short to be complacent! :)