Monday, February 22, 2010

Times Are a'Changin'

So let's see -- it's been since September since I updated my blog. I could easily blame this on Facebook. I mean, let's admit, those tiny and not-so-tiny details of your life, including photos, are so easy to put there and everyone from grandma to your first friend at five years old to writing buddies and online friends can see it instantly. Makes updating this a little less -- well, frankly, necessary. But, having said that, I'm doing it anyway.

First change, of course, for those who noticed: NEW BLOG LAYOUT! I wanted it to match the website a little better but also, I needed a change of all things from attitude to life in general to even how my blog looks. Don't knock the small stuff.

So what's happened since September? Well, the divorce was completed at long last, and remember that post I made in January 2009 about watching the world through the windows and how I have to make changes to my entire life to fix that little issue? Oh man oh man, have I made those changes.

I have no doubt in my mind at all that there are a few toxic individuals I've had the displeasure of knowing who still come here to see what I'm saying (one of the reasons I haven't posted in so long -- don't feed the hyenas) but then I realized they really have zero to do with me and my new life anymore, and that includes releasing any power they think they had/have by doing what I want, when I want, INSPITE of their constant presence. To those people, I hope one day you can find your own peace without it being at the expense of someone else. You truly do not have to lie, manipulate, and lose all morality in order to be "better". Promise.

Now that those issues have been addressed, where was I? Oh right -- January '09 Watching Life Through the Window Thingy. Right after I'd typed that post, I met an amazing individual named Rick Sanders, and despite my huge, huge issues and my huge, huge amount of offspring, something insane inside him decided to love me anyway. He moved to Cameron (can you even believe it?!) and we bought a house and now we're working on our own happily-ever-after, and over a year later we're doing a damn fine good job of it. Then, in September, Syd Vicious joined Girl Scouts -- first time in like 20 years GS have been in our town -- and lo' and behold -- I'm the Junior Leader, and I have to tell you, I LOVE IT. It has changed my life beyond words, and only those who truly knew me could appreciate how much of an impact these two things -- Rick and Girl Scouts with Sydney and Carly -- have changed me as an individual and mostly as a mother.

And now that so much of my personal life is finally obtaining serenity (did we EVER think this day would come?!), I'm writing again. *gasp*shock*omg-you're-lying!* Nope, it's true, and just recently even entered a contest again. And Rick is determined I make it to Nationals again having missed the last couple of years. AND, in the manner of support-his-woman that he is, he's going to drive me to Nashville himself. Now my goal is to write on my blog as much as possible, even if it's not all sunshine and rainbows, and to be ME. And if there are those out there who support me and what I write here, FANTASTIC! And if not, there's an X at the top of the screen. Feel free to click it.

And for those who ever read 100 random things about me, Rick just fulfilled another one off my list: I now own a basset hound puppy.

And I named him Casanova.


Laura said...

That is so wonderful Brenda.... to hear that you are finally at the point in your life, where you are able to not only be the person you want to be.... but the mother you've always dreamed of. Granted, it doesn't take having a man in your life to be those things... but having one to cheer you on sure as heck makes it easier.


Brenda said...

Thanks, Laura! It's great to live it and you're right: Don't need a man to do it, but it's so great to have a partner and teammate who supports you and takes some of that burden off, ya know?

Dy said...

For years I've waited to read these words!! It brings such a smile to my heart to literally FEEL the happiness readiating out of this post!! I am so freaking happy for you, and I can't wait to read some of your books when they get published!!! Then I can say "I'm a friend of Brenda Bradshaw...yes THAT Brenda Bradshaw!!" *grin*

Brenda said...

Aww, thank you, Neecy! Love ya, chica!

kayhil said...

This makes me so happy. You and the kids have waited a long time for this. I'm glad it's finally happened for you all.